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Hey, Woody!
My boyfriend has incredible stamina and he often remains hard after he’s orgasmed.  Because he often c-ms before I do I want him to stay inside me when he’s f–king me until I can c-m myself.   But he’s afraid that ejaculations can cause a condom to break so he pulIs out.  Now I don’t know about the rest of your readers, Woody, but when I’m bottoming and I want to c-m, I want my partner’s d–k inside me, not laying on top of me.  Can he stay inside me and still be safe?
—   My Turn!

Dear My Turn:
Actually, the condom is less likely to break after he c-ms in it.  Here’s why:  It lubricates the latex, protecting it from tears.

There’s another reason, too.  Most erections decrease in size and firmness after ejaculation, further decreasing pressure on the condom.

Still, he’s right for pulling out.  With more lubrication on the inside and decreased girth from orgasming the condom won’t fit as well and it’s more likely to slip off.  And oh, dear, there goes his milk all over your cookies.

You have two options:  1)  Teach him how to last long enough for you to blow some wattage (there are standard techniques for delaying ejaculation.  Look it up in the web or look at some of my past columns).  2)  “Double-bag” him.  Have him wear two rubbers.  It’ll decrease his sensation so he can last longer and keep you safe at the same time.  But Dear Lord, who wants to wear two rubbers?  I vote for option #1.

Hey, Woody!
I enjoy anal stimulation during masturbation and sex, and have noticed my rectum often produces a clear fluid when I insert a finger or toy in it. When I have an orgasm, the fluid becomes more copious, almost as if I had ejaculated back there. It even looks and smells like semen. What’s the mystery liquid?
—  Smell My Finger

Dear Smell:
Your ass—unlike a vagina—is not self-lubricating.  There’s moisture in the anus but there are no glands capable of producing fluids when you’re getting plowed or doing the job yourself.

The stains on your sheets are probably a combination of several different bodily fluids.  First and foremost, sweat.  When things get hot you perspire.  Sex gets us excited and all worked up.  Unless you’re a Republican.  Then *someone else’s* sex life is what gets you all worked up.

Depending on what position you’re taking on the matter, sweat could run together and collect near your anus.

Second, the motion of anal stimulation (in and out and in and out–you know, like most men trying to decide whether they want to be in or out of a relationship) draws fluid from the rectum to the opening of the anus.

Third, yer lube.  Personal lubricants heat up from the combination of friction and body heat, which makes them runnier, foamier, and sometimes creamier than normal.

Again, will somebody please tell me why lubricants are “personal?”  I mean, the last time I asked for a “public” lubricant the guy behind the counter just scratched his head.

But then again, I shouldn’t be asking these kinds of questions at a fast food joint.

Hey, Woody!
My nipples are large and round. I’m not fat, and the rest of my body looks normal, but my nipples are so big I am ashamed to take off my shirt in front of other guys.  Is there anything I can do about it?
—  Too Nipply

Dear Too:
Asking you to accept your chest in the Nazi-body culture we live in may seem hopelessly unhelpful, but it’s the only way out of your anxiety.

There’s a pot for every kettle.  Believe me, there are lots of guys who love big nipples.  Take your shirt off and you’ll find them.

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Woody Miller
Woody Miller is 180 pounds of twisted steel and sex appeal. At least when he looks in the mirror. He’s the author of How To Bottom Like A Porn Star and How To Top Like A Stud.